Incubus once sang “Life is a roller coaster and I am not strapped in” and that’s how I’ve been feeling except that a roller coaster is at least on a track and that’s not how my life feels–I feel like I’m living in chaos and I can’t figure out how to put my life in order.
I have listened to all the motivational podcasts, I’ve read the blogs; and yet I can’t seem to put it together–I can’t seem to put together my life in a way that so many people seem to have been able to. Maybe it’s a lack of confidence, maybe it’s a skill issue.
I’m supposed to be waking up and ATTACKING THE DAY. But that never happens. Usually it’s the other way around, the day attacks me.
I need to change what I’m doing but I can’t figure out what I’m supposed to change. Usually the answer is “do more” but nearly every single minute of every single day is already accounted for before I even wake up. There are great demands on my time. I have a demanding full time job that regularly requires early mornings and late nights, I have a wife, I have children, I have responsibilities. I cannot shrug them off. If I do my life will absolutely fall apart.
I know I’m supposed to wake up at 3am and work out and then work on my online business which is supposed to make me a million bucks. Maybe that works for some people but it hasn’t worked for me yet.
I feel like my life has been a long list of failures. I’ve been trying for a long time to escape from Shawshank with my family, but I just can’t figure it out.
I’m not giving up, of course.
I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do next.
I 100% believe I can escape Shawshank, it’s just none of my plans have worked yet.
I guess the only option is one foot in front of the other.